Update – Eve, you were right on the money. They ran a fast drip, way too fast. Gave fluid to resolve failing kidneys without consulting a cardiologist. The result was that his poor heart could not keep up, and was unable to pump away all of the extra fluid. He had a major episode last night, and this morning tests revealed fluid around the heart and lungs. We don’t know exactly how much damage was done, but enough.
The oncologist phoned me this morning to let me know we;re in the last phase now. No treatment of any sort is possible because of the heart issue. I also spoke with his cardiologist, who is very upset. No one called him. If they had, this might not have happened.
We’re planning to bring him home with a full palliative care plan. We have a meeting with the oncologist, the social worker, and Luke to let him know what is happening. However, he knows in his heart of hearts what happened, and what it means.
He’s experiencing a lot of anxiety right now and that isn’t heling anything. He’s continued with the morphine today, mainly to allow him to breathe better and get some rest. Tomorrow I start helping him to find a way to cope, to find hope for improvement and more good days, and to assure him that he’ll be comfortable and well cared for at home. A good antianxyllic would probably be a good idea right about now, and I’ll ask about that too.
I’m exhausted, have had a few good cries today. There have been so many small errors in this whole fiasco, and they all added up too quickly. I try to remember that his case was incredibly complicated, that it was all too easy for errors to occur, and that people tried their best within the time and resources they had available.
I know how hard it is – when they were giving the IVs I kept looking at the pole thinking “how is this going to affect his heart”. I may even have mentioned the fluid restrictions problem, But it was late at night after a long haul, I was tired, and I didn’t puzzle it out well enough. I thought “call the cardiologist” but I didn’t say so. So they are no more to blame than I am. We were all working under difficult circumstances.
So…. the final stage of this has begun, and we will do the very best we can to make this stage work well for Luke as long as we possibly can. I am still not adverse to a miracle, if anyone upstairs is listening?
Thank you for your prayers. We continue to be very much in need of them.
Margaret
.
