Mom

[geebeebee]

We had a devastating day at the hospital today. Mom again has a severe bout of graft-vs-host in the stomach. From the weakness of her mastectomy and the last bout of GVHD combined with Parkinson’s and other GVHD issues, Mom has determined that she is not going to battle it again. Her doctor told her that is most likely a wise decision, as she probably wouldn’t survive the heavy steroids for 2-3 months.

Now I must come to grips that Mom isn’t going to survive. She is the bravest person I have ever known, and she has absolutely earned the right to let it go. We very much respect the decision, as much as we are not looking forward to the result.

Mom told Dad that she feels like a load has been lifted off of her shoulders, and slept like a baby all afternoon. For the fact she is comfortable, I am very grateful.

Now for the hard part: how do I tell my six-year-old son about his grandparent that he cherishes? I just don’t know if I can do it. I think it’s best to wait until later — he already knows she’s very sick, and there’s no need to upset him so while she’s still with us.

Even though it’s the end of the MDS fight for us, I will continue to root hard for all of you to defeat this disease, and I’m confident that it will happen, hopefully very soon.

Thanks as always for all of your thoughtfulness, support, and inspiration.

Greg

[Suzanne]

Greg, I am so sorry! At least it is a blessing that your Mom is comfortable with her decision and physically comfortable. My thoughts will be with your family in the days ahead.

[Lolam]

Your mom has been on my mind every day. I was hoping that somehow the setbacks could be overcome. I am so sorry to hear that the combination of diseases have just ganged up on her. She is still so young, how we had hoped she could have been her so much long. There comes a point when the quality of life has to be considered, no matter how hard it is to face. She has fought long and hard and needs a rest. I am so glad she was able to have peaceful sleep when the decision was made. Who knows? God may give her a longer life than is expected in spite of it all. I hope these days will be the most special days of all. So many good memories are yet to be made and that little 6 year old will never forget Grandma. May God give you all the wisdom you need to know what to say to this little one.
You and your family will be in our prayers. I am embarking on my own journey with SCT after breast cancer..I felt close to your mom in that regard. MDS is disheartening after winning the BC battle.

“He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; But those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.(Isaiah 40:29-31)

[KATHY1]

Greg,
While I’m glad that your mother is at peace with her decision and the rest of the family understands that it is problably for the best, I am also so sorry for the pain and sadness ahead for all of you. I hope you are able to find strength through the support of your family.

As for how to tell your six year old – when it comes time you will know what to say. I have a 5 year old (as well as a 9 and 3 year old). When I told her a friend of mine had given me a book written by Maria Shriver which may be helpful. I myself didn’t read it to the kids though I did read it myself. I found my own words came out better.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Kathy

[PAG2005]

Greg,

I’m so sorry to hear this news. Your mom has been so strong and she has fought so hard but I can understand her decision. She has been amazing. I’m glad she is at peace and is comfortable. You and your mom will be in my prayers. Pat

[CMH64]

Greg,

I am so very sorry to hear the latest news. Your Mom has been an inspiration to me as she and my husband and Marsha have traveled the SCT road together. She has been amazing! Your Dad and you have been amazing also in your love, care and support for your Mom. Know that you are all in my thoughts and prayers. I am glad to know that she is in a caring supportive environment (St L. is the best)and that she has peace with her decision. Please keep us posted as you can. Cathy

[mommachkate]

Hi Greg,
I am so terrible sorry to hear about your Mom condition. My heart aches for her and you, and your family. I hope she will have no pain and discomfort.I wish you strengh to go through this difficult time. Warm regards Kate

[ButchL]

Greg:

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. My wife also lost the battle to GVHD. Enjoy every day with her and be with her as much as you can.

Butch

[Terri]

Greg, I am so sorry to hear this news. There are no words to express but know you and your family continue to be in my prayers. Peace be with all of you.

[Donna]

Hi Greg,
I’m so sorry to learn of your devasting news. I agree though that you can find some comfort in knowing your mom is at peace with her decision. I believe the suffering becomes to much to endure and it is at that point we must give our loved ones the dignity and respect they deserve.

I have 5 children and had to tell them twice they were losing loved ones. 1st their father and then my mom. I think the best advice I can give you is to be honest about it. Grandma is very sick and the dr’s can’t make her better anymore. My children found a lot of comfort in the belief that they were going to heaven where they would be free from their illness and they would be joined by others that have past before. All of my children also saw my mom and their dad when they were both very ill so they knew things were not good. It’s a tough one Greg, I wish you strength and courage to get through what lies ahead.
All the best,
Donna

[Marsha]

Greg,

My prayers are with you and your family. Your mom put out so much in fighting this disease. Hopefully she can now have a comfortable and pain free (Drs. can help with that) time. Don’t worry about your 6 yr old, they seem to remember only the good things. And they also help you get thru the hard things.

God Bless, Marsha

[Kathryn]

Hello Greg,

I can understand what your mom means about that weight being lifted off of her shoulders. I see it w/ my dad; battling this disease is both mentally & physically draining.

I wish her much peace & comfort in her journey and I wish peace for you as well. My days w/ my dear dad are nearing where you are now…. I put myself in your shoes and my heart breaks for what we are losing…yet at the same time, it feels peace with knowing what they have gained, relief.

Greg, your mom & you & your family are in my prayers and I am wishing you all the very best.

Kathryn

[Cherbear]

Greg,
Please know that you and your mom and family are in my thoughts and prayers. My heart goes out to you.
Peace,
Cheryl

[andrzej g.]

Greg,
There are times in our lives when we face the irrevocable.
Things too dramatic to be true and too true to come to terms with.
We keep fighting but each time the battle is prolonged we do not know if it is for hope or for suffering.
Challenging the fate. Being so consciously brave. So human.
It makes us proud of our relatives.
But again… Is an illusive hope worth to be traded for such a great burden of sufferings ?
What odds would make the stake worth risking..?
Questions without answers.
Greg. Your Mom and You did the best you could.
I know you’ll make out the best of the time you are still given.
Thinking of You.

[sarah]

Greg, our thoughts and prayers are with you and your mom.
God Bless,
Sarah

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