Some things I learned…..

[patti]

Mom’s funeral was saturday. It was supposed to rain and we asked God to just give us a 1/2 day of sun/no rain. God gave us sun all day. It was perfect. Her funeral was beautiful and the gospel was clearly preached. Mom would have been pleased.

But the purpose of this post is to share some things that I learned in the last ten days of mom’s life. Not just about her, but about available treatments.

1. No matter how many predictions the doctors/nurses give you for how much time a person has left, don’t listen to them. Each medical person that saw mom had a different time table for when they thought she’d pass. Everything from 15-30 days to 3-5 days, etc. Even my little sister who is a medical professional and went through this with her daughter was wrong. Everyone is too different and those predictions will only drive you nuts. The best indicator that death is near is someone’s color. My best friend told me this and sure enough, when mom went from pale to yellow and grey she died within 24hrs. Just as my friend had said she would. So, go by someone’s color. You won’t go wrong with that.

2. I mentioned this in a previous post but it’s worth repeating. NEVER allow anyone to brush a persons teeth that has low platelets. Don’t let the CNA convince you they can do it without bleeding. We ended up using Dr.Kou’s magic stop bleeding powder on mom’s gums after 24hrs of bleeding after having her teeth brushed. It worked, but we had to suction her mouth every 15 minutes because the bleeding was so profuse. Dr.Kou went into his office on Easter Sunday to give me some of the stop bleed powder. If you’re going to brush teeth, at least be prepared with this chinese powder stuff (have no idea what it is).

3. Did you know that the Hutch in Seattle has a natural medicine treatment program????? Neither did we. Mom’s CNA had cancer 3 times. The first two times she went to the Hutch and refused chemo and told them she would only do natural medicine. They have a whole department that does that stuff for people! Twice the Hutch helped her totally beat cancer naturally. The third time she got ovarian cancer and did 4 short/light rounds of chemo and then they did natural from that point. She’s been cancer free for two years. They send all her blood work to a chinese medicine doctor in CA and he makes up herbal formulas and sends them to her. So for folks who would like to use natural medicine even as a body support while they’re doing any sort of chemo, etc., the Hutch will do this if you ASK them. Can you believe that? I had no idea! We didn’t go to the Hutch because we thought they would only offer drugs. Fortunately, we found Dr.Kou and that was fine, but you’d think they would advertise this. Maybe they don’t because they’d lose too much drug money but whatever the reason – if you’re interested in combined natural therapies and allopathic medicine or just natural therapy, ask them. She said not all the doctors even know about it so just keep asking until you get to the right person/place.

4. Nothing anyone says can prepare a person for watching someone die.

5. God is still on throne, and still faithful. Even in all our pain.

Okay – that’s it. Just thought I’d share those.

patti

[choijk]

Patti, thank you for sharing your experiences with all of us on this forum even when you are in grief. I know from reading through your posts, you were not only an advocate for your MIL but you were also a great daughter, companion, and friend to her as well. You did the best you could and I am sure that your MIL knew that. My condolensences to you and your family. I will be putting in a prayer tonight for you and your husband that God may give you peace and help you throughout this time of grief. God bless.

[Caroline]

Patti.

Thank you for EVERYTHING.

You learned alot. You shared alot even when it was toughest.

Blessings,
Caroline

[Jimbob]

Patti,
I am sorry I could not make it to your MIL’s service. You have been a great source of information and support for many while you were also being a wonderful daughter-in-law and caregiver. I hope and pray that your new role will be give you many joyful experiences.
Jim

[maueenh]

Patti,

I am so sorry to hear of your mother in law’s passing. You have been a wonderful caregiver and a valued member of this forum.

Maureen

[Teresa]

Patti;

I am sorry for your loss. Thank you for the info. I talked with my Mom this weekend about trying alternative medicine.

May God Bless you and your family

[krishananth]

Hi patti,

My heartfelt condolences with you and your family.

May the departed soul rest in peace.

Regards
Sandhya

[Alice S]

Dear Patti
Thank you for still being here for everyone. I know your MIL is very happy and I can only imagine how she must be feel to be free of her earthly body and have a new disease free, perfect one again!
I pray for God to give you strength to carry on taking care of your SIL. YOu are so brave!
Alice

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